the burnout
I am tired and kinda crabby today. I was tired and kinda crabby last night. I still lovelove my team, but am suffering some bad derby morale. I'd like to see something actually *happen* when people have legitimate complaints- instead it feels like we get a bunch of lip service and the power structure vaguely shuffled around every three months or so. I feel very pessimistic about any positive change in the league today. It's not helped by the fact that I'm tired and I want a break, but I have to keep pushing until the finals. I want to have my derby time to work on music, to work on Burning Man prep, to work on the convention, to spend with S4 and my friends. I'm now resentful of the time it's taking from me, but if I don't go to practice the last two weeks before the championship I will also feel guilty about not supporting my favorite ladies. Blah. As it is, I'm skipping thursday to get ready for my show this weekend, which I'm fairly certain will be the best thing for me both practically and mentally.
Teammate seemed surprised that I'm not even trying out for interleague... well... that's why. As much as I love to travel and I love to play derby and I'd love to do both at the same time, I relish the thought of not *needing* to practice until October. A lot.
Anyway. Almost done.
I wanna go get my motorcycle. It's motorcycle time! The warm weather does a lot to improve my snarky mood. As much as I don't want to move, I wonder how much having a house with windows will improve my mood/feeling tired in general...
Teammate seemed surprised that I'm not even trying out for interleague... well... that's why. As much as I love to travel and I love to play derby and I'd love to do both at the same time, I relish the thought of not *needing* to practice until October. A lot.
Anyway. Almost done.
I wanna go get my motorcycle. It's motorcycle time! The warm weather does a lot to improve my snarky mood. As much as I don't want to move, I wonder how much having a house with windows will improve my mood/feeling tired in general...